Deep Contemplation is the key


If you feel that the burden of your problem is too much for you to handle and you want to share it with somebody who can understand you, feel free to communicate with Ajay at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.. He will meditate on your problem and try to think with you for finding a righteous solution. It may not necessarily be the solution that you have in mind.

Let us think without the box together!


Love and Blessings.


Brief Introduction of Desire for approval


MEANING
It is a desire for hearing words of praise about oneself, about one’s work or even about those one is attached to – like one’s children, spouse etc. When one is under the influence of this desire, one tries to behave according to the expectations of others so that they can be kept happy. It is almost impossible to keep others happy all the time and it is also impossible to keep feigning all the time. Thirdly, not following what one truly wants to follow is also a kind of a burden on the head. For these three reasons, desire for approval becomes a source of agitation, fear, misery, jealousy and anger. Jealousy happens when somebody else gets approved and they don’t care about one’s feelings.

THE TRUTH
It never comes from anybody else – your wholeness, your satisfaction, your joy. You have a wrong belief and you act and react accordingly. Desire for approval makes you weak and fearful. It makes you live in a chase mode all the time. It causes distress. When the desire is not fulfilled, you are miserable. When it gets fulfilled, you are still chasing as you want it to continue all the time. You know in your heart of hearts that it is not possible, so your fears and weakness remain even when they do start approving you.

WAYS TO DEAL
Correction of the wrong understanding is the sure way of dealing with the Approval problem. You need to deeply think about your true needs – it is a state of fulfillment and not what others are thinking or saying about you. If you follow the latter, you can never have the former. If you directly follow the former, there will not remain any need of the latter.
Secondly, think about the state of the mind of people you are depending upon. Is it worth it? Thirdly, think about the cost that you are paying for not following your heart and instead following the hearts of others.
Fourthly, you are not even following the hearts of others as most of them do not have one or they are too busy following others’ hearts. Who has the time and inclination to think about you? When they appear to be doing so, it is more of gossiping and not the real care that is exhibited through their behavior.

Z MEDITATION WAY
Deep Contemplation using Deep Inquiry and Radiant Mantras has helped many students come out of their approval issues for good. You will need to be serious about it. You will need to straighten your priorities absolutely straight. This life is too short to be frittered away in worrying about what others are thinking about you. Wake up. Today is the day.

Brief Audio Introduction of Stress Management


STRESS

Half the world suffers from stress. It is the cause of most diseases also. The doctors are slowly understanding the inseparable connection between mind and body. If one wants fulfilment, one must take very good care of body as well as mind. In a stressful mind, the body cannot remain healthy.


Stress is a combination of fatigue, hurry and worry. The fatigue can be due to physical exhaustion or it can be mental, arising due to a seemingly insurmountable problem – I-can’t-handle-it-anymore attitude. When one is stressed, hurry takes the form of ‘helplessly imagining forcing an outcome and seeing defeat in the end’. Worry also happens due to a strong desire to control a future happening and a hidden feeling in the background of the mind that it may not be possible to do so.

THE TRUTH
The very basic want of all beings is fulfilment and happiness. But, whenever one believes that one’s fulfilment and happiness come from external factors, one gets prone to the inevitable consequences, i.e., stress, worry, hurry, fatigue, sadness, anger etc. ‘That fulfilment and happiness reside in money or relationship or status’ is an absolutely wrong notion.

In reality, fulfilment is a state of the mind which believes that it does not reside anywhere else; it resides only in non-chasing and non-desiring.

WAYS TO DEAL
There are two ways to deal with this problem:

The Initial Preparation: Bring about life-style changes.These may include the following:

    • Bringing about discipline in life through thoughtful time management – writing about the jobs of the day and how much time needs to be given to each one.

    • Prioritizing between oneself – one’s happiness – on one hand and one’s job / relationship / possessions / status etc.

    • Consciously bringing leisure in one’s life – pursuing one’s hobbies – and learning to spend on things that give relief. It may include travelling, music, games, movies, theatre, reading fiction and non-fiction, yoga, massage etc.

    • Finding time to go out and help needy people. One must utilize one’s strengths for doing that. If one is good in teaching, this is what one can give to those who are in need of learning. If one has spare money, one should be doing charity thoughtfully.

    • While facing problems, preparing oneself through pre-thinking and learning to differentiate between thinking and worrying. Learning to do strategic planning, instead of running round in circles of vagueness and confusion. Have a positive attitude even toward the failures. Try never to force an outcome. Just do your best.

    • Learning to do pros-cons analysis in all situations, in the light of one’s clear goals – which means having clear goals, first of all. These things are much better done in black and white.

    • Repeating this mantra ten times a day in the morning before stepping out of the bed – consciously and truthfully – ‘Even this will pass away’.

    • Repeating this mantra ten times a day at night on going to bed – ‘Acceptance is the sweetest living’.

    • Going into solitude for one day in two months. Just one Sunday in two months – no gossiping, no television, no chores, no responsibilities. If one cannot do even this much, it only means that one is not serious about oneself.



Z MEDITATION WAY

The Cure Way: Meditation and deep contemplation is the sure cure way. Cure is internal. For lasting and stable happiness, it involves a clear three point detachment program:

a. Learning to detach from the mental formations which include all one’s feelings too.

b. The next step is detachment from one’s wrong fulfilment equation.

c. Detachment from one’s wrong conditionings, i.e., general beliefs.

When you are able to detach from your own mind-intellect equipment, you will be able to mould its formations at will. There will not remain any reason for you to fall into stress trap or any other such trap.

When your thinking deepens, you realize that the world consists of nothing but your mental formations and after having outgrown their grip, you are able to blissfully enjoy each and every moment of your life. Each and every situation, painful or pleasant, is just a passing happening for you. Your attention is fixed on what is happening in your mind and you see to it that you don’t fall into any mental deception again.

Z Meditation uses Deep Inquiry into the roots of the agitations in order to detach from them. It helps in realizing the state of freedom by giving up one’s involvement in wrong beliefs.


If you want to outgrow suffering, we can suggest a three point strategy:


1. If the problem has really gone out of proportions now and you are not able to find any solution on your own, take the help of the meditation master. Ajay will meditate on your problem and try to give you a solution. You may go to the Green Boxed Link at the end of this page and submit your problem to Ajay. Let him think now.


2. Secondly, for a long term solution, you do Z Meditation Online Course. It is a two-week course that will surely help you understand yourself and your spouse much better. You will be able to detach from your agitating mind and get a very strong tool for mind work.


3. If possible, join a silent Z Meditation Retreat either in India or in US – as early as you can. Be very clear about one thing – nothing is more important in life than your own happiness and freedom. You deserve happiness and freedom. You can get happiness and freedom – there may be some work involved to get that.

Take a deep breath. Close your eyes and think. Then decide decisively. Don’t remain in a limbo please. Decide and Act. Now is the time.


Please delay no more. Now is the time to decide and take strong steps to get back Life.

 


Brief Introduction of Low Self Esteem


MEANING
LSE arises from an understanding that one is inferior to others. It results in a feeling of meekness, fear and shrinking. The cause of LSE is one’s giving excessive importance to money, status, objects of senses or people etc. Seeing others having more than oneself, one tends to fall into LSE. One who is gripped by LSE will cringe before others and will sadly brood over one’s misfortune and others’ fortune.
The feelings of ego, lust, anger, LSE, greed, attachment, jealousy, sadness and excitement etc. are all governed by the understanding of the person. Having illusory conditionings alive in one’s system, it is not possible to get rid of these feelings and hence, it is not possible to attain peace also.

THE TRUTH
The reality is that the understanding that gives importance to the external objects for one’s happiness is illusory. True happiness happens when this understanding itself is dropped – lasting peace and wholeness is attained thereby. Otherwise, one goes on experiencing excitement or misery, in one form or the other.

WAYS TO DEAL
First and foremost is the understanding that one need not follow what others are doing. That is not the way to happiness. Happiness is the real need and not the objects of the senses. It is only when things get muddled in the mind and one starts believing that the objects must be desired in order to be happy, that one becomes miserable.
For bringing about this correction in understanding, deep contemplation is the way. Yes, very deep contemplation. One should sit with oneself and think about the rightness or wrongness of the perspective that is controlling one’s life.

Z MEDITATION WAY
Deep Inquiry consists of six brilliant questions that help in removing the dust of illusions and re-creating the true happiness state that is one’s birth right. When you do this work in a silent retreat, the effects are astounding. One enters the retreat Ms. XYZ and comes out Ms. ABC. One’s entire understanding gets overhauled.
Beyond that, one experiences the truth of the Mantras, the age old wisdom of the Self. One realizes one’s true nature and gets a very effective tool to go back home with. After that, one just needs to practice daily for keeping the flame shining.

There is, in reality, no real connection between the world external and the world internal.In Z Meditation Retreat, we learn that experientially. Living in silence, you become very aware of the imaginary connections and relations you have created in your mind. You realize that these imaginations are giving you pain. Prioritizing straight, you learn how to detach from these unreal connections.

When you reflect closely upon your own life, you find that it is those supposed solutions to your problems that turn into new problems with the passage of time. When your desires do get fulfilled – and the non-fulfilment and delay in fulfilment were your earlier problems – you tend to start taking them for granted in no time. Then you begin looking at something else that you feel will give you relief. That ‘seeking something else’ becomes a new problem for you.

You also have expectations from people you are mentally connected to. You want your husband or wife or children or friends or parents etc. to behave the way you like. You cannot appreciate the differences in mental patterns and behaviours. You have strong right-wrong definitions that your society has imposed upon your mind. This is also a problem and it causes acute suffering.

At Z Meditation, we try to de-condition ourselves from the wrong societal conditionings. We learn to dissociate the emotive perspectives from the factual ones. The former causes suffering and the latter gives peace. Whenever there is a mis-match between what you believe in and the actual reality, suffering takes place. Most of the people in the world go out and try to conform the actuality to the beliefs. It can never happen. There will always be shortcomings. This majority of people suffer due to this futile effort. And there are those few in the minority who would rather change themselves. They have all the likelihood of living in peace and happiness.

Whatever your problem is, can you try to look at it in the light of the above definition of suffering? Whenever there is a mis-match between what you believe in and the actual reality, suffering takes place. Now ask yourself what do you want to change – yourself or the world around you. You cannot change the latter, which is for sure. But you can surely change yourself. That will give you lightness and peace.